It’s On My Permanent Record, Mrs. Swanbeck.

Mrs. Swanbeck, my sixth grade teacher. She was the one who introduced me to the concept of a Permanent Record and the notion that one could be an underachiever (Tommy, you have potential, will you every dear boy use it?). Which I’ve always wondered about, if you aspire to be an underachiever and achieve it, does that make you an overachiever? I may have to investigate a class at the U of MN some semester that can help me with that question.

Now, I looked for my Permanent Record years ago. This mystical piece of paper that she threatened would follow me for the rest of my life. The one that documented I teased Marilee Selsbeck in the fourth grade, or that I brought matches to a fifth grade recess (thank you Steve Swanson, you snitch). But back in the 70s when I called the Minneapolis Public School System and asked for the Permanent Record Department, they declined to help. They insisted there never were any Permanent Records and if there had been, they would have been destroyed years ago because of possible civil suits against the school system. When I asked them if they knew Mrs. Swanbeck, they started hyperventilating and hung up. A few days later I called back but the number was disconnected.

So, Mrs. Swanbeck, let me put this into the permanent record of the Internet, something that will be around until the cows come home (which I have reason to believe will be in 2027): my final grades for Fall Semester, 2019:

While I totally screwed up my Anthropology Final, I’m pretty pleased overall. I guess the ANTH final is understandable, one question was describe Neanderthal characteristics and I said my older half-brother.

It was a great semester and I am locked and loaded for the next one, which starts January 21. I will keep you posted. Until then, Yip Yip.